Happy Father's Day to my Dad in Heaven. Miss him every day. He accepted me for who I was, even though he didn't understand why I was "different." He was a strong, quiet, hard-working Father and his love for family was very important to him. He sometimes had trouble connecting with me and sometimes me with him. I regret the years that we both could've tried a little harder but, with Mom telling all of us that we need to express our love with a hug and the actual words, I actually got comfortable hugging my Dad. Thinking back, it was a little forced on both our parts at first. It was something that neither of us was used to and was a little awkward for awhile.
I think the ultimate honest expression was when I went to hug Dad before I left to return home one evening and he wrapped his arms around me and said, "I love you" and then continued to hold me even though I started to stand up to leave and he wouldn't let go. I settled into his hug for about a half minute and felt myself smiling and getting a little teary eyed.
I always knew my Dad loved me. I just wondered whether I had disappointed him. That hug and his words seemed to make all my doubts disappear.
I've heard stories about Dad's who had trouble expressing love and affection to their kids. Some of it was generational and some of it was just an inability to let themselves express what they actually always felt. I will always be grateful for that evening when my Dad embraced me and said the words, "I love you." It's probably the best gift he ever gave me--that and being my Dad.
Happy Father's Day Dad. I love you.
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